Why I am here? What am I ought to do? How am I to live meaningfully the opportunity to be with the people whom I deem to serve? These questions continue to guide my everyday doing especially my 40-day mission exposure in Socorro, Surigao del Norte. The opportunity to link the classroom theology with the people’s theology is indeed a blessing. This gives me a glimpse of the work in the ‘vineyard’ of the Lord and so I could better prepare and nurture myself in the future ministry of the Church. Moreover, the encounters allow me to appreciate the more the process of formation in general e.g., the trainings, the encounter with people, and the exposure itself.
On a personal note, I am also grateful with the people’s response on our stay in their respected places. Their stories of love, survival from tragedy, loss of loved ones, hurt-full experience both within and outside the family, victory and triumph over poverty, and still to some or many their continuous struggle from famine and poverty, and other stories of the Socorro people are worthy to be treasured. It made me realized the beauty of diversity; that is of culture or practices of people’s and families, set of beliefs even though in the vision of One God (This includes religious diversity), and the views and perspectives of life. Each story has a lesson to tell. It offers me hint and weight in the future decisions I have to commit. In fact the experience taught me to be grounded, to live with simplicity, and to relate truthfully with people. Because they are sensitive people. They instinctively know if one is not comfortable, approachable, or amicable. The people of Socorro are simple and honest with their feelings, status, and views of life. They are also hospitable and friendly; they welcome strangers; they help one another especially in times of short comings, they are also God fearing. Noticeable, also is their superstitious beliefs. This maybe because of our images of God e.g., a vengeful God, a just punisher, a generous, loving, merciful God, etc. Undeniably our image of God affects our relations with one another.
Their openness to me made me open my world to them also; to mean my personal life and encounters. Though admittedly, I still have reservations. This may be because I am afraid to invest my emotions to the people I just knew and will know for a short period of time. To invest emotions seems to be a useless endeavor for I had only little time and giving them my heart all the time means to allow it to be broken into pieces several times. I would leave soon, I told myself considering the six days and five nights stay per assignment places. Recognizing this fear and hesitation, I gradually conquered it through confronting myself. The confrontation brought me to realize that I did not come to Socorro for myself alone. I have come with my brothers and that coming is to continually follow Christ; I was not brought to Socorro to bring Christ there because He is already in Socorro waiting for me. Our coming rather is to bring the images of Christ that we had from our encounters and so we could share it to the people. And, I hope and pray that we were successful in sharing the Christ that we had- the hopeful, loving, and smiling Christ.
To lay continuously my heart bare to the people therefore, is far surpassed. We have Christ in our midst – in our sharing of experiences, in our meals, in our daily work for living, there is Christ so that when we share affection with each other brokenness is only a stage where we desire for more. That is to share and to love more. The time constraint is not really a limitation. I believe that if we really become friends, our friendship will not be ended because my exposure is already through. But because we let our hearts be broken, the time that we had really mean something. That is, we make our hearts more restless to connect despite the distance. We could still show care through reaching out and to update ourselves with our situations in the present, and more importantly by our prayers with one another, the friendship that we have will be continuously nurtured. I think this is far greater than being a mere spectator of life.
I see three choices, in this exposure should I say: to be a mere spectator who watches and cheers only, a runner who avoids and flees, or will I be a committed person who knows how to risk. Spectators are those bench sitters who claps and cheers to those in the spectacle. They wanted to harbor the emotions of the actors because for them it is easier to fail and feel pain in shows than that of the real life. Runners also are afraid of painful experiences. Both fear life’s engagements and so they pour much effort just to avoid commitments. Spectators and runners may avoid stumbling blocks to spare themselves from getting hurt. However, it is not forever. We cannot avoid the reality of being hurt. It is already a shadow of life. To be a runner and a spectator therefore, is only an excuse. They are scapegoats. Moreover, though a committed person is close to the possibility of pain and being wounded, of failure and distress, it also gives way to transcendence to surpass whatever is excruciating in the present. A committed person therefore, had real experience of triumph and victory. I guess I was a spectator and a runner before when I hesitate to open and share myself; I desire service in following Christ but I did not fully give myself to that commitment.
Now, thinking and meditating the exposure that we had I hope we were triumphant and victorious. We have surpassed ourselves. Moreover, whatever our inadequacies by the time given we also apologize for our deficiencies and we still hope and strive to improve ourselves. I would not pre-empt that this mission exposure encounter of mine is already enough. Indeed, there is still lot to learn and experience. This first-hand experience would always be a treasure to remember. I would not forget the families who accepted me in their respected houses and the many experiences that we had. All those experiences contribute to widen my horizon, to strengthen my faith, and to inspire better service in my motives.
Their openness to me made me open my world to them also; to mean my personal life and encounters. Though admittedly, I still have reservations. This may be because I am afraid to invest my emotions to the people I just knew and will know for a short period of time. To invest emotions seems to be a useless endeavor for I had only little time and giving them my heart all the time means to allow it to be broken into pieces several times. I would leave soon, I told myself considering the six days and five nights stay per assignment places. Recognizing this fear and hesitation, I gradually conquered it through confronting myself. The confrontation brought me to realize that I did not come to Socorro for myself alone. I have come with my brothers and that coming is to continually follow Christ; I was not brought to Socorro to bring Christ there because He is already in Socorro waiting for me. Our coming rather is to bring the images of Christ that we had from our encounters and so we could share it to the people. And, I hope and pray that we were successful in sharing the Christ that we had- the hopeful, loving, and smiling Christ.
To lay continuously my heart bare to the people therefore, is far surpassed. We have Christ in our midst – in our sharing of experiences, in our meals, in our daily work for living, there is Christ so that when we share affection with each other brokenness is only a stage where we desire for more. That is to share and to love more. The time constraint is not really a limitation. I believe that if we really become friends, our friendship will not be ended because my exposure is already through. But because we let our hearts be broken, the time that we had really mean something. That is, we make our hearts more restless to connect despite the distance. We could still show care through reaching out and to update ourselves with our situations in the present, and more importantly by our prayers with one another, the friendship that we have will be continuously nurtured. I think this is far greater than being a mere spectator of life.
I see three choices, in this exposure should I say: to be a mere spectator who watches and cheers only, a runner who avoids and flees, or will I be a committed person who knows how to risk. Spectators are those bench sitters who claps and cheers to those in the spectacle. They wanted to harbor the emotions of the actors because for them it is easier to fail and feel pain in shows than that of the real life. Runners also are afraid of painful experiences. Both fear life’s engagements and so they pour much effort just to avoid commitments. Spectators and runners may avoid stumbling blocks to spare themselves from getting hurt. However, it is not forever. We cannot avoid the reality of being hurt. It is already a shadow of life. To be a runner and a spectator therefore, is only an excuse. They are scapegoats. Moreover, though a committed person is close to the possibility of pain and being wounded, of failure and distress, it also gives way to transcendence to surpass whatever is excruciating in the present. A committed person therefore, had real experience of triumph and victory. I guess I was a spectator and a runner before when I hesitate to open and share myself; I desire service in following Christ but I did not fully give myself to that commitment.
Now, thinking and meditating the exposure that we had I hope we were triumphant and victorious. We have surpassed ourselves. Moreover, whatever our inadequacies by the time given we also apologize for our deficiencies and we still hope and strive to improve ourselves. I would not pre-empt that this mission exposure encounter of mine is already enough. Indeed, there is still lot to learn and experience. This first-hand experience would always be a treasure to remember. I would not forget the families who accepted me in their respected houses and the many experiences that we had. All those experiences contribute to widen my horizon, to strengthen my faith, and to inspire better service in my motives.
As of 2015, Fray Marck Louie Cañete is second year simply professed friar and is also a second year student of Theology in the Recoletos School of Theology at Quezon City.